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Knowledgeablenoel

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Sep 08th
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Man to Man
Getting it Right and Saying I Do for County Triallist PDF Print E-mail
Written by Knowledgeable Noel   
Saturday, 17 May 2008

Active ImageDear Noel,

I’ve a trial with the county squad next Saturday, Noel. My twin brother is getting married the same day, and I’m the Best Man. The wedding is at 1o’c.

The hotel say they will be serving the dinner between 6.30pm and 7pm. The trial game is down for 7.15pm. It’s a desperate clash and the entire family, not just me, is very upset by the whole thing.

I’ve been trying for years to get a run at county level, and can’t believe my bad luck that it has come now on such an auspicious day for the family. My brother was very sickly when he was young, they didn’t think he’d pull through, but he’s a fine man now and enjoys a game of Badminton during the winter.

Anyway, my question, Noel, is how should I approach the pre-trial scene in the dressingroom? Should I talk to established players, or keep to myself? I don’t know the protocol in these matters and would appreciate your assistance.

- Conor, Munster

Last Updated ( Saturday, 17 May 2008 )
 
Looking Forward to Better Times PDF Print E-mail
Written by Knowledgeable Noel   
Sunday, 04 May 2008

Dear Noel,
I was a centre half-forward all my life, with all the glamour that implies. My ten year-old came home from school today and told me he wants to be a full-back. Is there anything I can do?

He’s Aries, headstrong. My wife says I should be more tolerant of minorities. I drive a taxi.

- Jimmy, Lower Limerick.

 
Being Fair with Fairer Sex PDF Print E-mail
Written by Knowledgeable Noel   
Wednesday, 30 April 2008

Dear Noel,
Our school are playing a final next week. I’m left corner-back, and have played well all year.

My problem I will be marking a girl, and I don’t know what to do. I’m shy around girls and blush quite easily.
She’s very tall, and kicks with both feet. She’s stronger than most boys our age.
She scored 2-4 (2f) in the semi-final. But what do I do now? Because she’s a girl, I don’t think I can impose my trademark physical game on her.

My father says it’s a man’s game and I should treat her no differently, but I just don’t feel right about it all.
What should I do, Noel? Her name is Myra. Myra Hennelly.

- Evan (11), Mid Mayo.

 
Leaving No Hostage to Fortune PDF Print E-mail
Written by Knowledgeable Noel   
Monday, 14 April 2008

Dear Noel,

I work in Dublin. A fellow at work is onto me to come out and train with his club. I’m afraid they’ll lure me away from my home club. My grand-aunt mentioned that I might contract Stockholm Syndrome? You know anything about that? I’m a half-back, good on the breaking ball.

      - Clive, Co. Clare

 
Statement About Resignation of An Taoiseach Bertie Ahern PDF Print E-mail
Written by Knowledgeable Noel   
Monday, 07 April 2008

        I have been inundated with enquiries as to my role in the resignation of An Taoiseach Bertie Ahern on Wednesday last. I am happy to deal with these matters here, the proper forum for such issues. This is my only public statement on the matter:

 
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Irish Examiner

 

Knowledgeable Noel’s Agony Uncle column appears in the Irish Examiner each Saturday.

 


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